"Godly Abstention" means the lifestyle which leads to knowing God . [Brahmacharya is the term Gandhi uses]. This lifestyle is impossible without practicing self-restraint. Not just SEXUAL self-restraint, but also restraint from anger, resentment and similar passions. For such passions place our confidence in our physical strength and mental abilities (the BODY instead of the SPIRIT). They lead us into continuous contemplation of how we may engineer the defeat of our enemies by cleverness or force. By this focus, we are removed from God.
Overcoming Sexual Obsessions
On This Page: • "Self-Abuse" Tract
• Preachers: Avoiding Sex
"Being enslaved by one's animal passions is perhaps the worst slavery of all."
The mystics say happiness is within. It involves possessing your self (soul) and wanting nothing else. By looking outside your self, you displace your soul and become the thing you seek. This is the source of addictive behavior and unhappiness.
From an article by Mohandas Gandhi. Some contemporary terms replace the original for clarification. - Ray Jefferson.
Let me clearly see that this way of life springs from the strength that comes from self-respect and dependence on You.
Above all, give me understanding: the wisdom to sort out the complexities of the sex drive. It's too easy to confuse what the body wants with what my spirit needs. Deliver me from this confusion and don't let me be misled.
Remind me, Lord, that many people endure much worse afflictions and deprivations. And that people live happier, more purposeful, inspiring lives without sex.
Give me their vision, that I may join them.
I am to live without sex, Lord; therefore reveal to me how to express and use this great force you have given me for a significant purpose.
OVER TO THE "NO SEX" LIFE
Looking At Actual Processes For Transforming Toward Celebacy
Sex simply wasn't designed to be used for anything more than producing offspring. Once you don't need any more descendants, there's no justification for sex.
That being accepted, we then need to find out how to live so that sex is not a dominant thought in our lives.
For starters, remember: God designed us to STOP having sex at a certain point. Therefore, He gave us the ABILITY to avoid sex! It's in there somewhere, in our collection of instincts. It's society that keeps awakening the drive when it is no longer needed. So how do we awaken our "NO SEX" drive?
How about starting with how you looked at life before puberty. The adventuresome youth (before he becomes the sex-addled adolescent). The healthy drives in youth center around exploration of new territory, holding on to fantastic dreams of the future (e.g., science fiction flicks, etc.), secret society rituals - primary drives that already exist within us. We don't have to create them, we only need to rediscover them and let them mature into adult uses.
"Sports and Pure Thoughts"
Next: Spend as much time outdoors as possible. The artificiality of interior environments gives the devil a stale atmosphere that makes fantasies look tastier than they really are. After spending 8 hours in a factory or office, it's easy to envision an entrapping sex fantasy. But if you're aggressively hiking toward a greater goal in the bright light of "God's Country", you've got a better chance of resisting a temptation. FATIGUE and FRUSTRATION are the number 1 enemies: When the body & mind are crippled by futility, the imagination seeks the easiest energy source in the psyche: sex.
Three: Remember the Proverb: Protect your spirit [heart] above all else, for from it flow the forces [issues] of life. (Proverbs 4:23). Keep your SPIRIT'S energy level up and you won't have to lean on the ANIMAL INSTINCT'S energy of sex for motivation.
Mankind cannot live alone; every individual must live and interact with others. The absence of interaction can cultivate a misinterpretation of what human interaction IS, leading to imagery of physical interaction. Conversely, the liveliness that is cultivated through healthy fellowship prevents these hollow fixations. This is the design of God, who encourages the routine fellowship of His people among one another.
Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching. - Hebrews 10:25
Overcoming "Self-Abuse" • From a Guide to Mormon Youth
A Guide to Self-Control
Pray, Speak, Sing
Pray daily, ask for the gifts of the Spirit, that which will strengthen you against temptation.
Pray fervently and out loud when the temptations are the strongest.
When the temptation to masturbate is strong, yell "Stop!" to those thoughts as loudly as you can in your mind. Then recite a portion of the Bible or sing.
Follow a program of vigorous daily exercise, which reduces emotional tension and depression.
Double your physical activity when you feel stress increasing.
Work On Self-Improvement
Work daily on a self-improvement program. Improve your relationships with your family. Increase your service to your church.
Be outgoing and friendly. Force yourself to be with others and learn to enjoy working and talking with them.
Change in behavior and attitude is most easily achieved by improving your self-image.
Spend time every day imagining yourself strong and in control, easily overcoming tempting situations.
When on the toilet or showering, focus on the workday ahead. Draw attention away from the body. (*)
Arise immediately in the mornings. Don't lie awake in bed -- start each day with enthusiastic activity.
Avoid people, situations, pictures and reading material that might create sexual excitement. Throw yourself into work that produces success and superiority. (*)
Wear pajamas that are difficult to open, yet loose and not binding.
Put on several layers of clothing that would be difficult to remove while half asleep.
Hold an object -- for example, a Bible -- even in bed at night. Keep your mind on a project of high-purpose.
In severe cases, wear several sets of underwear. (*)
Be Alert To Emotions
Be aware of situations that depress you or that cause you to feel lonely, bored, frustrated or discouraged. These emotional states can trigger the desire to masturbate as a way of escape.
Plan to counter these low periods through reading a book, visiting a friend, doing something athletic, etc.
• www.ldolphin.org/mormon.html - source site
"Inflict some corrective pain on the body and you bring the body's lusts under control..." - Anonymous
- A period of self-imposed celibacy has special physical benefits for men. It is no secret that semen is a potent mix of powerful nutrients. Excessive ejaculation - either in the course of sexual binges or because of continuous self-gratification - will reduce the presence of these vital nutrients in the body. The effects of continual, excessive loss of these nutrients can reduce nervous endurance and mental acumen.
A great deal is being talked about and obscenities that seem to have taken deep roots in the society of the day. This contagion had been prevalent in the West. From there it has fast travelled to the East which used to be until not too long ago the cradle of modesty.
There are laws, censor and moral codes to deal with the problem. It, however, needs more than a mere crime-and-punishment approach. First, the mental outlook needs to be corrected by means of the right type of education and upbringing. The reform to control the animal instincts should go so deep, with sympathy and a kindly disposition, that the wayward should himself realise the sin inherent in his indecent and obscene behaviour.
To satisfy the sensuous instincts of human beings, God has laid down certain well-defined limits. One who crosses these limits is a sinner and, therefore, attracts God's displeasure and wrath and for him there is a blazing fire in the Hereafter.
We have ordained the stoning of adulterers and adulteresses, the whipping of fornicators and the killing of homosexuals publicly with a view to safeguarding people's honor, upholding moral values, encouraging decency and chastity and protecting society at large against moral deterioration and ultimate ruin.
Islam aims at creating a responsible and reliable society free of dependencies. It wants all the individuals in the society to keep their sobriety and soundness of mind (avoid alcohol), safeguard their property from unnecessary and exorbitant expenses (avoid usury)and protect their purity and good character.
Man is created innocent, pure, true and inclined to right and virtue.
• Marriage is recommended even for the impotent, for the stirring of desire is hidden and not susceptible to observation. Indeed, the recommendation to marry extends even to the totally castrated person who can never expect children, in much the same way as a bald man is recommended to pass the razor across his pate as others do (on Pilgrimage), following the example of the righteous ancestors. The original purpose of these was to demonstrate stamina in the face of the unbelievers, the imitation of this display of fortitude became the model conduct for later generations.
• The second benefit of marriage is to be safe from the machinations of the devil and to satisfy lust and hence protect the private parts. The Prophet said: "If a man marries, half of his religion is saved. Fear God for the remaining half."
• What is with you will end, and what is with God will last - 16:98 Q
AVOIDING SEXas pertains to preachers
Edited from: theresurgence.com/md_blog_2006-11-03_evangelical_leader_quits
My suspicion is that as our culture becomes more sexually rebellious, things will only get worse. I would like to share some practical suggestions for fellow Christian leaders:
This is a deeply rooted gospel issue. There's a way to master this, as it was designed by God. We need to bring it into focus and employ it. When done correctly, it's not a strain but a self-perpetuating flow.
- The only way to stay away from sin is to stay close to Jesus. Colossians says that we are prone to making a lot of rules, but that if we don't deal with the issues in our heart, we are fooling ourselves; holiness cannot be obtained by sheer white-knuckled will power. More than anyone, a Christian leader needs time with Jesus in Communion -- for their own soul, not just to make them a better leader. Death comes to every Christian leader who goes to Jesus and Scripture just to prepare sermons and not for personal nourishment.
- Most pastors I know do not have satisfying, free, sexual conversations and liberties with their wives. It is not uncommon for pastors' wives to really let themselves go; they sometimes feel that because their husband is a pastor, he's trapped into fidelity, which makes them lazy. A wife who lets herself go and is not sexually available to her husband in the ways that the Song of Songs is so frank about, is only encouraging her husband to sin.
"WHAT IF YOU'RE NOT MARRIED?"
"If a man marries, half of his religion is saved. Fear God for the remaining half."
- Every "guru" needs a guru. Every pastor needs a pastor with whom he can regularly have accountability and build up one another.
- Pastors should have their office at the church and their study at home. A pastor should come into the office for scheduled meetings, and work from home otherwise. Years ago when I didn't do this, lonely people, some of them hurting single moms wanting a strong man to speak into their life, would show up to hang out and catch time with me. It was shortly thereafter that I brought my books home and purchased a laptop and cell phone so that I was not tied to the church office.
- Churches should use heterosexual male assistants like Timothy and Titus to serve alongside pastors. Too often the pastor's assistant is a woman who, if not sexually involved, becomes too emotionally involved with the pastor as an emotional and practical second wife. I have a trustworthy married male assistant who can travel with me & do business, without the fear of temptations or false allegations.
- Pastors need to screen their email, deleting sexually implicit subject matter. Also, do not have a secondary email account from which to build a secret identity.
- Pastors must speak freely and frankly with their wives about their temptations. Without this there really can be no walking in the light and sin always grows in darkness.
- Pastors must not travel alone; the anonymity and fatigue of the road is too great a temptation for many men. A pastor should take his wife, an older child, an assistant, or fellow leader with him. If this cannot be afforded then travel should not be undertaken.
- Lastly, the big issue is a love and fear of God above all else. Without this a man will fail to live for God's glory, and he won't endure.